Rand Paul is Thankful Missy Paul is Safe

Rand Paul writes in TIME:

I am thankful that Missy Paul is safe. Missy was kidnapped by Boko Haram and survived a harrowing ordeal in which her school was burned to the ground in Nigeria. With a gun to her head, she was forced into the back of a truck with thugs who said they intended to “marry” her. As the truck sped her away from safety, from her school, and from her friends, she made the decision to jump. She was warned they would shoot her if she tried to escape, but she chose to tumble into the bush at a high-speed rather than become prisoner.

Who is thinking these photo-ops up? Will Rand pose with Russian President Vladimir Putin, who protected the people of Crimea from the thugs of Kiev?

If you are wondering if "Paul" is really Missy's name, we have this from Rand:

 As my time with Missy Paul came to an end, I told her, “We share the same last name. We must be relatives.” I smiled, “I want you to know that in America, you have a relative and you can count on me if you ever need help.”

But remember, this is Rand, so the essay contains this footnote:

*Missy’s name was changed to protect her identity.